The Beauty: Kendra Cunningham
FROM DUMPED TO DAING
Just broke up? There may or may not be a grace period before you’re on to the next one. There are a lot of factors to consider, did you get dumped or were you the one to initiate the breakup? Are you happy and relieved its over or caught off guard and in denial? But the biggest factor in play when it comes to how long it will be before you’re jumping back in the saddle, is relationship personality.
Relationship Realists
A relationship realist will get through a break up and spend some time- weeks, months, sometimes years- just dating, hooking up, and spending time solo until they find satisfying compatibility. These people have a good sense of self, a conscious awareness of their personality, goals, and ambitions. Their identity is not based on one aspect of life such as work, family, socioeconomic status. They are well rounded, emotionally healthy people. These are introspective, analytical, and independent people who want a relationship where both people can grow and pursue a romantic utopia, even though it may not exist. These people are less likely to want to make a commitment quickly but when they do they want to make it work in order to avoid admitting to a mistake.
Relationship Hoppers
A relationship hopper cannot be alone. They leave one relationship and get into another one AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE. They are emotional parasites looking for a relationship host. They define themselves by the relationship they are in. They tend to be wandering aimlessly through life or they may have a dream they are pursuing but they can’t seem to get out of their own way. They want someone to take care of them and remind them that they are likable because they don’t feel likable at all. They are codependent, needy, and emotionally exhausting people. They don’t want their partner to grow or pursue goals that don’t include them as it may upset the host/parasite dynamic. They’ll commit to anyone who asks with no questions asked but when the going gets tough these people turn to others to make themselves feel good again whether its cheating or leaving for another, these people are self centered and uncaring.
My last two boyfriends were relationship hoppers. One married the Kendra replacement and the other is engaged to his Kendra replacement. Both relationships ended when they suggested we move in together. I said no and they BOTH were living with “I guess she’ll do” within six months. Sick people. The whole bunch of them.
I want someone who recognizes I am not easily replaced.
I want someone who doesn’t necessarily want to live with me.
But mostly I want someone filthy rich.
I’m destined for an unconventional relationship.
Thanks for listening
Kisses-
Kendra
Kendra is a stand up comic living in Brooklyn where she owns a super comfortable bed. She spends most of her time wondering where the hell her sugar daddy is and hoping he didn’t settle.
The Beast: Larry Loveless
Let’s be honest, there are two ways to answer this question. Were you the one that got dumped or were you the one that broke up? Because chances are, the person who broke up probably is close to dating someone new. Even if a new person is not in the picture, the one who is breaking up has more than likely stopped having feelings for the significant other for an extended period of time. The time needed to rebound or heal is a lot less.
The person who has been heart broken, however, regardless if it is a male or female, a period alone is recommended. Jumping back into the dating scene too early, could prove to be hasty. To compare it to baseball, a team that fires a high strung fiery manager will most likely seek a mellow even keeled replacement. The same could be said about dating, attracting the total opposite or false feelings as a rebound replacement. It appears I have written this column like a politician and not directly answered the question, bravo! The real answer is different for every person and situation based on the above factors, plus length of relationship, living situation, etc. Not to mention if it was a relationship vs. marriage. But what do I know? I’ve never been married.
Good luck out there, as the Summer comes to the end!
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