By Chris DiStefano
How was everyone’s gobble gobble? Hope it was good! Mine was okay except for when my cousin hurled a turkey Leg at My uncle splitting open his eye brow and dripping blood onto the turkey. Think that would stop us from eating it? We are savages!! We took it old school, eating turkey sprinkled with the blood of our ancestors!! ( we were all hospitalized the following day) Any way if you don’t like, it, you can Beet it! That’s right Beets!! You know em, you love em! I used to eat them by the can full, not that you should be eating canned foods, we have talked about this mi gente!! But Boy oh boy are Beets Beetiful!
Beets contain a wealth of fiber — half soluble and half insoluble. Both types play roles in fighting fat. These colorful root vegetables contain powerful nutrient compounds that help protect against heart disease, childbirth deficiencies, and colon cancer! You know how I feel about your colon. I love colons. I used to be grammatically incorrect on papers in school just so I could hear my teacher say “Chris, in between sentences you need to use a semi COLON. That would make me feel warm inside. This is getting weirder and weirder I know.
Beets have been used throughout history for medicinal purposes, especially in treating liver diseases due to their detoxification properties. The adequate fiber amounts in beets also have cholesterol lowering properties and can help prevent arthrosclerosis. The beets belong to the same family as chard and spinach. Beet leaves have a bitter taste like chard, but is rich in chlorophyll. Although bitter, the greens have a higher nutritional value than its roots. Both beet root and beet greens are very powerful cleansers and builders of the blood.
Betacyanin is the phytochemical in beet that gives it its rich ‘amethyst’ color that significantly reduces homocysteine levels. Homocysteine is an amino acid in the blood that at increased levels has been linked to various heart diseases. It is important to keep these levels at bay. I know a good way to Beet them down. Haha, I kill myself! I live with my Mom, I’m 40. Beets can be eaten raw or you can boil, steam roast or sautee them. Additionally raw beets can be juiced in a Jay the Juiceman type juicer very easily! But be warned, beet juice is EXTREMELY strong and powerful! If you want to get naturally drunk without alcohol, take a glass of beet juice and see what happens. It is startling! If you want the benefits of beet juice but candle handle drinking it straight up, then mix it with some carrot or apple juice for a milder but still beneficial juice. So lets get Beeted up!!
So there ya have it, Beets are the best! They are Unbebeetable, they got me Beet Boppin all the way to Beet Street. Okay, Im going to go flush my face down the toilet for that one. See ya next time MI gente!!
11/29-Gun Show- 8p